We bought a house. I keep telling myself that this is a good thing, and deep down I know that it is, but I'm scared. We have lived in this house since Will was 16 months old -- he'll be 8 in February. It's home. Now we have to start all over making a new house a home. I'm not trying to be overly dramatic. I know it is just a house, but with so much of my family's life revolving around unpredicted changes, it has been comforting to have one constant...our home. We have been spoiled by having all four grandparents close by to lend a helping hand whenever we have needed them (which has been quite frequently). Once we move we will be over an hour away and definitely more on our own.
This wasn't a decision we made lightly, but one that was definitely necessary. Will just started his third year at the Clinic's Autism School and he isn't showing any signs of leaving any time soon. The commute has become increasingly difficult for him. Hours every day that are wasted by him strapped into a booster seat - hours that need to be used for intervention. So I know we made the right decision, but I'm still scared. Scared to leave my familiar lifestyle. Scared to leave our support network. Scared of all the unknowns: Will the new school district cooperate with us in meeting our children's needs? How will the children react to this tremendous change, when they don't even like it if I rearrange furniture? And scared of the new house itself and the challenges it will present to me due to its multiple levels (stairs are not an above the knee amputee's friend and the new house has lots of them).
But...the eternal optimist in me knows that we will be fine. My family is extremely resilient - we'll make this new house a home because it will be filled with love from the second we move in (that and a platform swing that will get hung in the kids' playroom; a ridiculous amount of toys that will quickly fill every available empty space; a huge jungle-gym set that will take up what small amount of green space we'll have, but love is the big one). So, yes, I'm scared about what lies ahead with this move, but I am also confident that we have made the right decision for our family - and that confidence will give me strength to tackle any fears I might have.
So let me start again...
We bought a new house and I am excited about the journey that lies ahead.